HOUSTON—Marking a momentous leap forward in humankind's understanding of the universe, NASA scientists announced today they had received a radio transmission confirming the existence of intelligent, extremely condescending life in a galaxy nearly 13... The Chicago Police Department has begun a voluntary workshop for officers who wish to tell their own stories and write their own books. Russia’s foreign minister said on Wednesday that Syria’s vice president would seek open talks with the rebels, even as regime forces were reported to be shelling the city of Homs. Whatever your perspective on how likely Mitt Romney was to lose the Republican nomination race prior to Tuesday evening, it should be acknowledged that he had about the worst results conceivable. In a CNET Editors’ review, Jason Parker gives the new GarageBand for iPad, iPhone, and iPod touch 5 out of 5 stars, citing the app’s “uniquely designed and authentic-sounding instruments, smart touch interface, and tools that make song creation easy.” He adds: “Anyone with even a passing interest in creating music should download GarageBand for iOS. Frankly, we wish we could give it more than five stars for the virtually unlimited song possibilities, ease of use, and excellent touch-screen controls.” COLUMBUS, OH—Fantastic roommate Billy Grant just won't stop buying toilet paper. USA Today reviewer Edward C. Baig describes his experience using the first Multi-Touch digital textbooks published for the iBooks 2 for iPad app, noting that they are “engaging in ways that were simply not possible with the textbooks I grew up with.” Baig likes the portability, updatability, and low pricing of iBooks 2 digital textbooks and touts specific features like instant search, highlighting, bookmarking, and interactive graphics. Writes Baig, “It’s better to see an animated tour of the genome in E.O. Wilson’s Life on Earth than just to read about it. ” The transfer of U.S. Marines to Guam will not require the prior closure of a base on the southern Japan island of Okinawa, the United States and Japan announced Wednesday. In a special post-speech analysis, panelists discuss what America did to make President Obama so angry he was actually spitting while he yelled at us. Rick Santorum won the Minnesota and Colorado caucuses and a nonbinding primary in Missouri on Tuesday, raising fresh questions about Mitt Romney’s ability to corral conservative support. Man Wants To Give To Local PBS Affiliate But Can't Stand Thought Of Free Doo-Wop Album In a new tactic for countering the data assault, offices are giving workers a second computer screen and sometimes a third. Apple today announced that iPhone 4S will be available in China and 21 additional countries on Friday, January 13. iPhone 4S features Apple’s dual-core A5 chip for fast performance and stunning graphics; an all-new 8-megapixel camera with advanced optics; full 1080p HD-resolution video recording; and Siri, an intelligent assistant that helps you get things done just by asking. “Customer response to our products in China has been off the charts,” said Tim Cook, Apple’s CEO. “With the launch in China next week, iPhone 4S will be available in over 90 countries, making this our fastest iPhone rollout ever.” Area Woman Recalls Days When She Resented Being Hit On Apple today announced financial results for its fiscal 2011 fourth quarter ended September 24, 2011. The Company posted quarterly revenue of $28.27 billion and quarterly net profit of $6.62 billion, or $7.05 per diluted share. These results compare to revenue of $20.34 billion and net quarterly profit of $4.31 billion, or $4.64 per diluted share, in the year-ago quarter. Gross margin was 40.3 percent compared to 36.9 percent in the year-ago quarter. International sales accounted for 63 percent of the quarter’s revenue. Apple announced that GarageBand, its breakthrough music creation app, is now available for iPhone and iPod touch. Introduced earlier this year on iPad, GarageBand uses Apple’s Multi-Touch interface to make it easy for anyone to create and record their own songs, even if they’ve never played an instrument before. GarageBand 1.1 for iPad, iPhone, and iPod touch is available on the App Store for $4.99 (US) to new users, or as a free update for existing GarageBand for iPad customers. In an interview at National Geographic’s Adventure blog, director Tim Kemple of Camp 4 Collective — an outdoor video and film production company — describes using iPhone 4S to shoot a hi-def music video at the Great Salt Lake as an experiment in remote location capture. Kemple reports getting excellent video from iPhone 4S, noting that “because it’s always with you means you end up using it when you’d least expect.” The interview includes tips for stabilizing shots, optimizing for iOS 5 features, using helpful apps in extreme environments, and shooting in low light. Republicans will reveal the identity of the Mystery Candidate only after he, or she, wins the election. Aries The universe, in all its wisdom, has a plan for everyone. Strangely, you're supposed to be the nun who holds up a distributor cap and winks while the Nazis try to start their car. Taurus That person you've been see... Blog post and video from Microsoft Digital Crimes Unit about company efforts to stop the Rustock spambot. Indianapolis Colts Somehow Wind Up With Exact Same Coaching Staff