Just in time for the holidays, Apple’s fifth Manhattan store opens for business at New York’s world-famous Grand Central Terminal at 10 a.m. on Friday, December 9. The store overlooks the historic Main Concourse and features two Genius Bars, entire rooms dedicated to Personal Setup and Personal Training, and an expert team of 315 employees. Holiday shoppers can test-drive Apple products, attend 15-minute Express workshops, get free technical support, and more. Aries The universe, in all its wisdom, has a plan for everyone. Strangely, you're supposed to be the nun who holds up a distributor cap and winks while the Nazis try to start their car. Taurus That person you've been see... Wired reviewer Brian X. Chen writes that a superb new camera and speedy dual-core processor are great additions to iPhone 4S and that Siri alone is reason enough to buy the phone: “To give you an idea of how convenient Siri is, it takes about three seconds to create a reminder with a voice command, as opposed to the 10 seconds it takes me to manually type an event into a to-do list or calendar entry.” Chen concludes: “…both inside and out, this is a magnificent smartphone.” Talking Trash Narcissist Thrilled To Find Symptoms In DSM-IV Students at Punahou School in Honolulu, Hawaii, are using Mac notebooks to research class assignments and show results in ways they never could before. These include songs and podcasts recorded and edited in GarageBand, digital presentations and portfolios created in Keynote, campus news videos edited in iMovie and Final Cut Pro, and even iOS apps built using Xcode. Says sixth grade teacher Sandy Chang, “The Macs in my classroom are completely indispensable.” Apple today announced that iPhone 4S will be available in China and 21 additional countries on Friday, January 13. iPhone 4S features Apple’s dual-core A5 chip for fast performance and stunning graphics; an all-new 8-megapixel camera with advanced optics; full 1080p HD-resolution video recording; and Siri, an intelligent assistant that helps you get things done just by asking. “Customer response to our products in China has been off the charts,” said Tim Cook, Apple’s CEO. “With the launch in China next week, iPhone 4S will be available in over 90 countries, making this our fastest iPhone rollout ever.” Blog post and video from Microsoft Digital Crimes Unit about company efforts to stop the Rustock spambot. The decision by a federal appeals court panel that Proposition 8 violated people’s rights all but ensured that the case would proceed to the United States Supreme Court. With no family or friends in attendance, Matt and Shandra Fink were quietly married in a low-key Las Vegas ceremony, but the couple went right from there to pulling off an exciting casino robbery. Facing criticism from religious-affiliated institutions, the Obama administration promised on Tuesday to explore ways to make a new health insurance requirement more flexible. WASHINGTON—Department of Health and Human Services officials held a press conference Monday to announce that while no studies had been conducted to establish that the practice is unhealthy, people still should not eat candles. The Chicago Police Department has begun a voluntary workshop for officers who wish to tell their own stories and write their own books. Apple today announced an all-new iTunes U app, giving educators and students everything they need on their iPad, iPhone, and iPod touch to teach and take entire courses. The all-new iTunes U app lets teachers create and manage courses — including essential components such as lectures, assignments, books, quizzes, and syllabuses — and offer them to millions of iOS users around the world. The app also gives iOS users access to the world’s largest catalog of free educational content from top universities including Cambridge, Duke, Harvard, Oxford and Stanford. And starting today, any K-12 school district can offer full courses through the iTunes U app. The biggest New York City hotel operators have agreed to a contract that will give workers, among other things, security devices that would summon help if hotel staff encounter danger in a guest’s room. In a special post-speech analysis, panelists discuss what America did to make President Obama so angry he was actually spitting while he yelled at us. $75.30 (+$.1.10) (+1.5%) The automaker's shares went up after it announced a deal with Costco in which the warehouse-store chain will carry 20-packs of Camrys. Nation Horrified By Carolina Panthers' Disturbingly Graphic Logo Redesign Apple today announced financial results for its fiscal 2012 first quarter, which spanned 14 weeks and ended December 31, 2011. The Company posted record quarterly revenue of $46.33 billion and record quarterly net profit of $13.06 billion, or $13.87 per diluted share. These results compare to revenue of $26.74 billion and net quarterly profit of $6 billion, or $6.43 per diluted share, in the year-ago quarter. “We’re thrilled with our outstanding results and record-breaking sales of iPhones, iPads, and Macs,” said Tim Cook, Apple’s CEO. “Apple’s momentum is incredibly strong, and we have some amazing new products in the pipeline.” Completely Whipped Man Crying At Wife’s Funeral Nine whooping cranes that had been following an ultralight aircraft as it guided them on their migratory route stopped when they reached Alabama, 500 miles short of the intended destination.